It’s a fact little known to all but a very few Molinist philosophers that, before God created the Universe, he did R&D work on some small offline models. Like any software engineer or web developer, he designed these very small universes to test subroutines that would be incorporated in the full release version.
One eternity, the archangel Gabriel noticed God crouched intently over his work bench, and asked, “Lord, what are you working on?”
“I’ve just made a couple of test universes to check out some ideas. When I run them, all they do is a single coin toss. Maybe you can tell me which you prefer. #1 I call ‘determinism’. It’s a very simple bit of coding, and it makes the coin toss come up heads.”
And so saying, he pressed “Enter” and sure enough, a coin flipped and landed heads up. “That seems pretty straightforward,” said Gabriel, “it sounds like another name for ‘creation’ to me: you will, and it comes to be. What’s the other one about?”
“Ah, you’ll like this one, because it’s really subtle. I call #2 ‘randomness’, and it means the coin has an equal chance of landing on heads or tails.”
“That sounds cool. What’s it for?”
“I haven’t really decided yet – but I thought it would make things more, well, interesting.”
“I suppose so,” said Gabriel doubtfully. “But Lord, you know everything – do you know how the result will turn out?”
“Of course I do – it’s heads,” God replied, as he pressed “Enter” and the coin flipped and landed heads up.
Gabriel looked at God, once more bent over his bench, and then at the two universes. He examined the coding carefully for quite a while, before he turned to God, looking baffled. “Lord, those two universes look to me to be absolutely identical.”
God looked up in feigned surprise, and a small smile began to play on his lips until, suddenly he laughed uproariously. “Got it in one! We’ll make a theologian of you yet, Gabriel!” And he slapped him so hard on the back that his wings shook.
God creates randomness, but is sovereign over it, so some say. If so, Blondie captured his inevitable mindset perfectly!